Not the body, though of course it is changing as it ages. Something in me is shifting again, and I can't quite put my hands around it yet. I was invited to participate in a "dark poetry" contest, and just couldn't get anything out of myself that sounded like what the others involved seem to think is dark. I have been through the self pity, and the self-loathing. I still indulge now and then, usually when I have forgotten to take my bi-polar meds. I don't do the Dundgeons & Dragons stuff much anymore, and vampires do NOT exist, despite much protest to the contrary. I sought imagery from my travels, especially in England, where so much that is old still lives amidst the new. I tried to weave a sense of darkness and maybe forboding, and had a lot of trouble with it. I haven't had to rip poetry out of myself in many years, but this was like giving birth! the results were not bad at all, but more Poe than any of the entries so far on the website. I suspect it would fall on deaf ears. Too romantic- not quite enough of the macabre.
I think I must be gaining some sort of Light deeper into this soul, because pulling up anything negative is harder than it once was. The interesting thing was that I started to see much more about the pagan group than I had; too many of them are where they are because of movies and other mass media. It is not as it was in my day, where one had to seek out the teacher and walk the path of the apprentice, proving loyalty and intent. Now one picks up a book or two, takes the "tests" and gets to become a wizard, warlock, witch, temptress....whatever temporary fix one needs to get through this mundane life.
I really shouldn't be too critical. There have always been those who joined the Craft for the wrong reasons, and still some of those eventually grew into the part for real, not just play. I hope that is the case with some of the ones I have read entries by on the site. I was just hoping for something a tad more serious I guess. I have always been a solitary, and now and then it is good to relate to others of my "faith"......I hate calling it that, bit insulting, but can't think of a good alternative!
I think my scientific background makes it tough for me to relate to some of the silliness I have read. And the idea that S&M/B&D are automatically connected to the Craft is crude and uneducated. I have participated in that , but not because I am a witch. And body peircing and tattooing have just as little to do with it. somehow the giant mish-mash of subjects have gotten interwoven into a whole new Thing, adn I am not sure I like it. Again, mass media, feeding the mundanes stories of perverted lifestyles, and non-"normal" behaviours, and somehow stamping it all with the title of Wicca.
WRONG.
WRONGWRONGWRONG.
but ya know what? I am going to make the curious reader go out and find out what it is all REALLY about, one on one with somebody who truly prctices the Craft, not some highschool or college kid who feels like a misfit and thus plays the part. I have always believed that this is one thing that should be passed down person to person, face to face, and no other way.
Or is that "Way"?
A good start might be a recently republished book called " The Way of Wyrd." It explains much and asks nothing but an ear to listen with.
Merry met, my friend, and merry parted- to merry meet again.
Blessed Be!